Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Singlehood

Since my last relationship (very short one too!), I've been single for almost 1 year and 4 months. Whenever my friends would ask me if I'm attached or have a lover, I would say I'm single and they would go, "Aiya, don't be so choosy laaa". Most people think that way, I'm too choosy or picky in finding the right guy.

I have gone after some guys that I really liked before, but it usually ends up that they are either not ready for a relationship or don't like me the same way. My very best friend, Joe, told me that I always had a tendency to go for guys who either, just got out of a relationship and are vulnerable, still young and wanna play around or are too popular to commit to a single guy. Judging from history of flops lately, what he said is quite true. He also pointed out that I can't really say that guys don't like me, as I do have my admirers but I either turned them down or chose to remain good friends. Is this a case of karma in my life right now? Am I being turned down by those I like because I turned down others that liked me?

Although people may think I'm choosy, I think that I have a right to choose who I want to be with. So why the hell aren't I in a relationship right now? Is this vicious cycle of rejection gonna end? Am I setting my standards too high? I don't really think so, as guys I like aren't male models or anything like that. But anyway, looks are nothing if someone has a shitty attitude, completely turns me off.

Then, Joe pointed out something that kinda woke me up. Am I actually opening up myself to gives others a chance? Do I shut myself almost completely when someone who's not my type approaches me? Did I give others a chance the way I'd wish others might give ME a chance? Did I give others a chance to show what they have underneath? It could be that Mr. Right had come along and I HAD turned him down before. This really hit me...he could've been right there and I didn't even know it!

I mean, it's nice to have mutual liking in the beginning and then start a relationship, but that's not always the case. Sometimes mutual liking doesn't happen in the beginning, a person can like another, but the other person is either indifferent or doesn't even like him, and that changes after both spend more time together. Thus, a relationship blossoms.

So, I should learn not to fall for guys who are not ready or willing to commit, and I should open myself to more options. Hopefully, my future BF and I will cross paths again some day...

2 comments:

Kevin TCP said...

Well, many (PLU guys) said that I'm quite choosy too :p. I never get attached, never have the sex experience with a PLU guy also... I agree with you that we have the right to choose the Mr Right who will accompany you until the end if possible lah... hehe!

MarkThePooh said...

Thanks buddy...I guess it's just not our time yet =)