Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Touching, Amazing and Inspirational

Kinda busy these few days, so just sharing some stuff worth sharing ^^

I've seen this for quite some time but it's still touching after watching it again. Real love is never forgotten, no matter what we are =)

Always appreciate and be grateful what you have right now. No matter how bad you have it, there are ALWAYS someone worse off than you, like Sam and Esther. No one, especially young children, should go through such suffering...

On a lighter note, I'm re-posting this amazing video. Such awesome coordination to pull them off =)

To end, this is something truly inspirational. I'm sure most of you have seen or heard of Nick Vujicic, a man who was born with any arms and legs. How someone who has such astounding physical limitations can be so strong, positive and inspire others is nothing short of amazing. He's truly a giant in our hearts.

If you think you have limitations that are holding you back, think of Nick. He reminds us that there are times when we feel SO beaten down, weak and helpless, but we should NEVER give up. Anything is possible =)

Sunday, September 27, 2009

10 Tips to Improve Self-Esteem

I found this on the net. Good tips so I decided to share =)

1. Focus on your strong points.

If you like something about yourself, give that area more attention than the others. For example; I love my eyes, so when I look in the mirror, I look directly into my eyes first, then I do a comb over of the rest of my body before returning to my eyes. If you like your tummy, then do the same. Try making a mental list of the things you like about your body, no matter how small or insignificant they may be. Then focus on these things, the rest is just insignificant. If you can learn to like yourself for your strong points, then others will find it much easier to do so as well.

2. Do things that you can be proud of.

Accomplish goals, help people feel better about themselves, get good marks on a test. Any of these things will allow you to be more confident about your abilities. If you are sure of yourself, then you will find it much easier to believe that you are attractive. Try making a list of things that you want to get done, and then DO THEM. This will make you feel like you are able to handle things well, and thus creates self-esteem.

3. Don't look for compliments until you are confident.

When you think you are ugly, and someone tells you different, how often do you change your point of view? My bet is on almost never. If you feel like you have done something well, and someone agrees with you by complimenting you on it, then your feelings were justified. However, if you think that you totally screwed something up, and someone compliments you on it, you will just blow it off as someone trying to be nice. When people believe something they look for examples that make their beliefs true. If you get something that invalidates your beliefs, then you just blow it off. Compliments will do no good until you are confident enough to believe them.

4. Respect yourself.
It's true. People respect those who respect themselves. Don't give other people a reason to laugh at you by starting the laughter. If you make fun of yourself, other people will follow suit. If you think you're ugly, other people will think you're ugly.

5. Smile!

It's amazing what a simple smile can do to improve someone's appearance. When you look at yourself in the mirror, don't frown. By frowning you are automatically putting a depressing tone on the act. If you look at yourself while depressed, you will see nothing but faults. Try smiling when you look at yourself. The good parts of your body will out shine the bad, and your confidence will come through in the image. Remember the saying "Smile and the whole world smiles with you, frown and you frown alone." As cheesy as it is, it's somewhat true. If you look happy when speaking to people, they will remember you in a much better light. Just don't over do it ;)

6. Do things that make you feel attractive.
Go for a run, go workout, get some exercise, or get a manicure. Whatever it takes to make yourself think you are better looking, do it. Even if it doesn't really make you look any better, as long as it makes you THINK you are better looking it will work to build your self-esteem. Remember, self-esteem means nothing more than how YOU see yourself. It is all in your head.

7. Learn to laugh at yourself.

Lighten up. Things are never as bad as you think they are. Everyone is his or her own worst critic. You will see faults in yourself that other people may never see. There is no need to worry about these things.

8. Be yourself.

Define your own personal style. Take things that you find attractive, and modify them to suit yourself. Different can be beautiful, and as long as you know who you are, you will be able to control your own image for the best. Don't sit around trying to figure out why you don't look like Angelina Jolie. She is unique, and that is one of the things that makes her attractive. Yourself will always be the best person you can be. Once you are comfortable with whom you are you will gain confidence.

9. Find the things that you don't like, and make a plan to change them.

I didn't like a few things about my personality, so I took steps to change them. I talked to a few people and I got input and suggestions about what I should change and how I should change them. Once you make a few minor changes in your personality, you will realize that you can create your own image with ease.

10. Examine your own actions.

Why do you like the people you do. Are you attached to or dating a model? I doubt it. Yet you are still with them. Realizing that everyone has different tastes is a big step in gaining self-esteem. There is always someone out there who is going to like you for who you are, no matter what you're like. There are many other things that you should be paying attention to. Your body is only one part of a whole. People will like you for your strong points, and the ones who do, will probably ignore your faults, or help you correct them.

Remember, self-esteem means nothing more than how YOU see yourself. It is all in your head. You can have an ugly person with great self-esteem, just as you can have a beautiful person with poor self-esteem.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009


Yes, that's what I feel about the 4-day weekend as it races past me, leaving me to bite the dust! It seemed like yesterday when I was waiting like schoolgirl anxious to watch Twilight for the 4-day weekend to start T.T

Oh, and I forgot, SELAMAT HARI RAYA to all my Muslim friends and readers!

Nevertheless, the long weekend was filled with lotsa makan-makan (good eats). It started on Saturday, when me and some friends had dinner at TGI Friday's. I still think food in Chili's is SO much better in portion and taste though, but I really enjoyed myself nonetheless in the company of my friends. Adrian was down from KL as well, and he joined us pretty late AND the waiter forgot to key in his order. We found out only after we finished feeding him our...leftovers (seriously XD), so he ended up canceling whatever he ordered. But they would thrown away if someone hadn't finished them, so we were saints in not wasting food by forcing generously offering the leftovers to the hungry boy, k? OK, moving ON! The highlight of the whole episode at TGIF was when Jeff managed to convince one of the waiters to give us a FREE chocolate fudge ice-cream cake by faking his birthday. Well, the whole thing started coz we noticed while we were there, 2 birthdays had been celebrated by the management and we're PLU so we cannot tahan not being the center of attention Jeff thought we should give it a try. Birthdays celebrated in TGIF basically involve the whole she-bang with the TGIF staff singing a song and making you stand on the chair and sing/call someone random and then holding the cake far away whilst coaxing you to BLOW the candle out. Wah lau, so far...spit better leh! ANYHOW, Jeff was gracious enough to go with the whole she-bang (without spitting at the candle) for the free cake, much to our amusement. Mmmm...dense chocolate ice-cream cake laden with thick chocolate fudge sauce. Needless to say, I 'tapau' almost all of it in my stomach XD

Sunday was kinda a normal makan-makan day. Just a normal open house in the afternoon by my gym instructor but it was rather pleasant. Went hiking a couple of hours after that coz I felt guilty after 'tapau'ing in my stomach; lemang, ketupat, rendang daging, fried chicken, kuih raya, air sirap, potato salad and specially brewed coffee! Also, I had a wedding dinner again on that night, although I didn't really eat much. In fact, I discovered the wonders of helium balloons! No no, not that I marveled like an idiot by the fact that they float upwards in the air, BUT for the first time in my life, I did what I always saw in cartoons/movies, I inhaled the helium and made myself talk like a chipmunk! It was actually a friend's idea at the time, but it was I who ended up inhaling helium from 3 balloons and making everyone at the table burst out in tear-inducing laughter. Needless to say, we laughed until the tables next to us probably thought we were drunk. Ah, such great time got helium balloons must play again XD

Monday was another open-house, this time of the PLU kind ^^. Invites were sent by my Muslim friend Sean, via Facebook and the open-house started at 10pm till late. It was the same place I went for house-warming. This time, I was nice little angel hor. Nothing happened and I didn't entertain requests to strip hor. OK, moving ON! Most of the people there were good and familiar friends (even Zemien was there!). X didn't come, but I thought he would and it doesn't matter. REALLY, it doesn't k?!

It was such a blast anyways. What could be better than a room full of booze and good friends with plenty of laughs and camaraderie? NO, I didn't drink much, get drunk nor take off any piece of clothing. Time also seemed to whoosh past, coz before we knew it, it was already 4am! Oh, the pandaness in me shall surely return with a vengeance! Poor Adrian though. He decided to follow me there coz his friend FFK'ed going back to KL with him that night, only to finally fall asleep at my place close to 5am and wake up at 10am today to drive back alone to KL.

Today, I felt guilty coz I basically didn't have time for my mum and sis. SO, it was off to a Japanese dinner at Sakae Sushi. Honestly, Jap food gives me food-gasms and I really needed my fix! Overall, a nice long weekend except for the lack of sleep part most of it XD

Friday, September 18, 2009

We're Just Dating...For Now

Nope, we're not attached yet. He needs more time to consider since he feels that he might not be able to put himself fully into the relationship yet. He has given me a timeline on when to expect his answer and I'm ok with that. He's being honest and I respect his decision, so I'm not going to pester or put any pressure on him. If he's really thinking about fully committing into a relationship, then kinda shows that he's being serious about it, not just playing around.

So for now, no strings attached yet. We're just having fun and being there for each other as needed. I've prepared myself if he wants to withdraw and just be friends. And I'm really fine with that since I don't think forcing anyone into a relationship is beneficial to anyone, nor is it the right thing to do. Only time will tell if we end up together.

If we do, then it's good.

If not, then just move on and I've gained another friend =)

Monday, September 14, 2009

Obnoxious Fool or Publicity Stunt?

For those of you following news on the VMA (not that I follow closely, just got this piece of news from a friend in Facebook), you would have heard by now on what happened to Taylor Swift while she was giving her speech after accepting the award for Best Female Video 2009. Kanye West practically stormed on stage, took the mic from her and clearly dissed her by saying Beyonce had the best MTV video of all time. Here's the video (it might be removed soon) of what happened:

Seriously, if he was just BEING Kanye, then he has never been more obnoxious AND disrespectful in his entire career. I'm not a Taylor Swift fan, but obviously the viewers have decided and she got the votes to win, and deserves to have her moment. I wonder how would he feel, IF he finally won something (LOL to that!) and someone else went on stage to just steal his much-awaited moment by announcing that someone did better. I'd bet he'd pop a vein and have a stroke right there on stage!

But IF it was a publicity stunt that was staged, I'd be just fueling that effort by making this post. What he did was a tad too daring and stupid, even for him. It'd be jumping to conclusions to say that there isn't any underlying motive to make himself look so bad so that he'd get more attention. And it's not an accidental outburst that would really kill his career as well *cough* Chris Brown *cough*. As if he doesn't have enough attention as the arrogant and hot-headed person that he already is, and I think this whole episode will just further aggravate his notorious reputation. Time will only tell if so-called publicity stunt would work in his favor or if his career sink like quicksand from all the new haters he just 'recruited'.

Regardless if Kanye was being an idiot or if whole thing was staged, POOR Taylor. It's her first award (I think) after working so hard, and this shit happens ruining the moment. Really felt for her as she was left speechless and dumbfounded and didn't even have enough time to finish what she wanted to say...

Saturday, September 12, 2009

The Date On Wednesday

I know I should've posted it sooner, but I was rather busy at work and kinda tired throughout the week to even bother (self-explanatory, I'm sure). Sorry to keep you waiting, here's what happened.

Wednesday was a proper but rather stereotypical date; dinner and a movie. I picked him up at around 7pm after work and we headed off to QBM (Queensbay Mall). During the day, before our date, he texted me that he was wearing green (click if you can't remember what it's about =P). Apparently, he's closely following my blog to know me better, since it's practically an open book to my thoughts, emotions and personality. After reaching QBM, we got the tickets first. Initially, we were supposed to watch The Orphan, but peculiarly it wasn't showing in GSC anymore, so we opted for District 9 at 9:20pm instead. After that, we headed for dinner.

After some questioning, he revealed a liking for good Chinese food, so I took him for a short walk across from QBM to Max Gourmet. Food there was quite good but we just had a simple dinner. There was still an hour to kill after dinner, so we took a short stroll on the beachfront of QBM. He doesn't mind any public display of affection. In fact, he's enthused by it. So, as we walked, we periodically held hands or he'd grab my arm and put it around him. He's actually taller than me for 5 cm, so sometimes he'd lean on me, hugging me from behind. Of course, we only did that at spots where there weren't many people around. The beachfront is a popular haunt for malay couples or entire malay families who wanna 'makan angin'. No wonder lah quite a few BRIGHT spotlights dotted the whole beachfront, not including the adjacent street lights. Takut maksiat kut! *kidding*

After a short stroll, it was getting kinda warm so we headed back to QBM. Still having some time to kill, we just continued walking around window shopping and talking. Even in QBM mall, we'd sneak holding hands. Going on the escalator was kinda nice. On whichever side I stood on, he'd stand behind me, lean on me and put his head on my shoulders. I don't mind any public display of affections, but it took a little getting used to at such a public place, as it felt a little awkward at times when more people were around. I didn't shy away though, just let him do what he wanted coz the closeness felt nice. I noticed some people stared a short while, but I didn't care.

Consequently, it was movie time. We got our popcorn and took turns heading to the loo before going into our cinema hall. He actually brought a flask of tea for me, which he managed to sneak in under his jacket. It was really sweet, but we didn't manage to finish it. I have a small bladder and making multiple trips to the bathroom during the movie wasn't nice. What happened during the movie was a first for me, and it's something that I will never, ever forget. We held hands throughout the entire movie. Occasionally, he would lean close to me, placing his head on my shoulders. A couple of times, we'd both look at each other briefly sneak a quick kiss. By the way, District 9 was an AWESOME movie! Nothing less could be expected Peter Jackson, such attention to vivid detail and unexpectedly gory as well. During more intense scenes, we held each other tighter. It was really sweet and lovely. It's the stuff that you see straight couples do and wish you could do it, and I did! I could swear the Malay lady sitting right beside him shooting some glances towards us. Must be thinking,"Apa dua monyet nie buat?".

It was almost 11:30pm when we left the cinema. I took him back to USM and along the way, he hinted a few times to head back to my place. Wah lau, young people nowadays, so aggressive lorrr. I had to work the next day so I declined, but I was intrigued about certain lake USM he told me about the day before. "No lights one, quite dark one", he said. Long story short, we ended up taking a walk around the dark lake. No need to point out that we were in each other's arms the entire way ya. It could end well or end really badly, if you know what I mean (to those who are blur, what Chinese month is this currently?). Luckily, no UNEXPLAINABLE events took place, so it went rather well. When we walked to some place dark enough, we kissed. This time, we went fully French and he snuck his hand down my pants. He was getting really 'hot' and wanted to 'do' something there, but there were some people around, so again he asked to go back to my place. This time, I obliged...

Back at my place, I made it clear that I'd take him back at 1 am. We ended up on my bed hugging and cuddling, before we proceeded to explore each other's mouth further in a passionate lip-lock. Needless to say, piece by piece, our clothes fell on the floor. I said I wanted to take him back at 1 am, but I didn't want him to leave so soon after it 'started'. It's been such a long while since I felt such closeness and connection with someone. We didn't engage in anything 'heavy' that night, just some 'mouth work'. After it was done, he wanted to overnight at my place, so I was ok with it.

We spent the remainder of the night asleep in each others arms. A hand on my pants woke me up early morning, way before it was time for me to wake up. Then, we began another 'session'. Wah lau, I forgot how 'active' certain young people can be. I sent him back to hostel after breakfast, before heading off to work. It was rather tiring, but felt really nice to be that close and canoodling with someone again.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

A Lovely Late Date

I went on a lovely late date last night. His name is YZ (not a fake nickname, actually initials of his name). He's a 20-year-old student in USM, Penang who hails from KL and he's only been here for 2 months. I actually got to know about him from Zemien, who got to know him from Planet Romeo last week. Added him in Facebook only yesterday and the flirting kinda really hit it off. Long story short, we decided to go for supper yesterday after his rehearsal at around 10, but then it got cancelled so I picked him up at 9:30pm instead.

Took him for a rather long drive to Northam Beach Cafe. For some reason, I made a few wrong turns and we made huge U-turn through town before we made it there. I didn't really have much expectations coz after all, I had just known him for a day. And Zemien was keeping mum about him, wanting me to find out by myself! Dinner was rather ordinary, talked mostly about normal stuff and it went by rather quickly. It was sort of an ice-breaking where we got to know each other on the surface.

After dinner, we went over to Esplanade where we took at walk around Padang Kota Lama under the faint silhouetting moonlight and rather invasively bright, single spotlight lighting the field that night. The night was windless, not even the slightest breeze and it was rather warm. I felt rather guilty coz the poor boy was hauling his laptop bag all along, since he had just came from campus and had his laptop and books (which he left in the car) with him when I picked him up. Being the gentleman that I am (OBVIOUSLY!), I offered to carry it for him a few times, but he said it was fine for him. I noticed the municipal council has done a great refurbishing the whole place. All around the field was renovated to resemble a nice park, great place for walking or even jogging. As we walked, we talked more. I know that he was into me, it was quite obvious.

After we covered a round, I wanted to find somewhere to sit and talk even more. So, we found a nice seat right under a short tree that shielded most of the light around us, so it was a rather dark. It was there that we really opened up more and got to know each other on a deeper level. He shared about what he wanted and his directions in life and about what mattered most to him. We talked about our personal lives, some past relationships, our thoughts, our family and a bit about sex. As the night progressed, I noticed that he was sitting closer and closer. He already had his arms around my shoulders when we sat, but I didn't mind at all. As we continued to talk, he was becoming increasingly attractive to me. Seriously, it was like he was growing cuter by the moment or my hormones were intensifying, either one lah! At some points in our conversation, I couldn't stop looking at him and I SO wanted to kiss him. You know, the feeling when you just wanna grab the person's face with both hands, pull him towards you and proceed to suck the life out of him just plant a kiss on his lips. At some point, I commented that the single spotlight was kinda bright. In truth, I was REALLY hoping that it would be darker so that I could really sneak that kiss. After all, we were in a public place and there were a few Malay couples hanging around. There was one right behind us, and I was really hoping they would just scram.

Oiii, bulan puasa lah! Cepat balik tidur lah! Nanti I report you both maksiat or khalwat then you know! Cis, kacauness!

Aaaaanyways, I guess I gave away my intent and he was already leaning very close to me. At some point, our face was almost touching and we shared a moment of silence just enjoying the closeness. But, it was getting really late (post midnight) and I had work the next day. So, we headed back and I dropped him off in campus. He was rather cute with his strong hints of heading back to my place or me staying over at his hostel along the way, but his roommate was around. was just one of those dates when you really wish the night wouldn't end and you just wanted it to go on and on. I really enjoyed spending time with him and I know he feels the same way. What really impressed me and attracted me to him was the level of maturity for his age, from the way he talks and behaves. He's also quite down-to-earth, which I really like as well. He can converse well and almost at the same level as I do, which is definitely a plus. It's been a while since I'm really able to make such a connection with someone. It's been quite a while since I had such a great date, simple as it was. I revealed to him earlier that I might be moving to SG just to clear the air but he was fine with that. Anyhow, I'm not gonna thinking too much about anything right now. Just going with the flow to see where this leads me to.

I KNOW my friends will say that I'm dating a younger guy again coz that has been the trend lately but I don't care. I just wanna be flexible and just go with the flow. I'll be going on a date with him again tonight, for dinner and a movie. Looking forward to seeing him again =)

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Kumar The Drag Queen

Just discovered this in FB today. She's a Singaporean drag icon who is also a dancer and famous comedian. AND she does it VERY WELL. This shit is FUNNY!!! Enjoy =)


Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Merdeka Eve Well-Spent?

EDIT: Added some photos courtesy of Vivien.

Last weekend was nice, interesting and tiring all rolled into one. A good friend from KL came down, went clubbing to a new place which was apparently for straight people (BORING!), went for house-warming at a friend's place, which turned out to be rather interesting.

For starters, on Saturday, one of my absolute best gal friends Vivien FINALLY stepped on Penang shores after 15 years, despite living only in KL(-_-"). Anyhow, what do you do when your friends come to Penang? Why, stuff their faces with our glorious Penang food of course! She actually came with 3 of her cousins (all pretty ladies) and stayed at the cheap but good and clean Tune Hotels @ Burmah Road. Those girls were quite self-sufficient, despite haven't been to Penang for many years (pretty sure exceeding 10 years). They even rented a car for the whole weekend to go around when I couldn't meet up with them. Got lost here and there, but rather impressive that they could locate places like Kek Lok Si, Penang Hill, Batu Ferringhi and even the hidden but beautiful tourist spot there called the Sunset Bistro. Unless you drove into the sea or crossed the bridge, you'll always be lost within the island. You can always call up a friend from Penang and they can meet up with you somewhere and guide you back. Seeing her again in Penang was really great, since I'm always meeting up with her only in KL.

Vivi along with her gorgeous cousins.


The interesting part was actually on the night of Merdeka eve. There was a house-warming party by a PLU friend but I could only arrive later, since I was Vivien at Batu Ferringhi till about 11pm. Long story short, I got there with a few of my PLU friends at around 12am. The party started at around 9pm, so being pretty late was an understatement. I thought it might have died down a bit but when we got there, the place was still filled with friends of the host. Most were familiar faces to me, and made some new friends too.

Barely 5 mins I got in and sat down, X walked into the living room. Now, I had spotted X a few times in various places and thought he was kinda cute. And here, he showed up so I was kinda pleasantly surprised. Introductions then took place and as he extended his hand to mine, he said,"I have you in my Facebook, right?"

A little dumbstruck, I replied,"Do I?". After we introduced ourselves, I spent quite a few minutes figuring out who he was, then his name hit me and I DID have him in my list. The whole place was rather lively and very loud. Gosh, put many gays together and we can really bring down the house. Several points during that night, X and I talked mostly about random stuff. I found out that we shared a mutual friend, which made a good conversational piece.

As the night progressed, he was getting partially drunk. At one point, he put his hand of my arms, felt it and commented that I was quite muscular. I just smiled and said,"I'm just alright, not too big or anything." Then, he proceeded to feel me up more, his hands traveling all over inside my shirt. I was a little embarassed, coz we were just seated in the living room, in full view of everyone, though it was rather dimly lit. Several times, he wanted to go lower into my pants, but I stopped him.

After about 15 mins of getting fondled, he turned to me and said,"Wanna go make out?". He had this look on his face, like how a tiger was gonna pounce on a innocent deer (ME!).

I didn't know what to say, so he hugged me from behind and said,"I wasn't kidding you know."

So, we crossed the living room and headed into the dark guest room and for a brief make-out session, coz he was leaving soon. I guess everyone saw us and knew we were up to some hanky-panky, coz the door was unlocked and someone knocked. He had the softest lips ever, I can still taste them. It was just for fun, and I don't see anything coming from it. He's only 19 but he's cute and really my type. I'm being very cautious about CYTs (cute young things) lately since my 2nd ex.

LOL...when we were making out, he told me that I'm not taking advantage of him coz he knows what he's doing. Normally, I won't do such things, but I went with the flow this time.

SOOO, I'm not taking advantage of a 19-year-old who's partially drunk, k?

I'm an angel, k?

Good guy, k? *innocent puppy eyes*